Have you seen my Twinkie?

I originally started this entry on a really somber note because I’ve been struggling with how to end a friendship that seems to have run its course. After a few re-reads, it really started to sound like bad college poetry or some 80’s pop ballad…a few more metaphors and references to the changing of the seasons and it could've been the script to one of "those" commercials that always seems to come on TV when my parents visit (awkward). Seriously, I've struggled with this one because it can’t be tied off in a nice, neat bow and discarded. No, this will be not be a simple raising of the glass and toasting to old times never to be repeated but a conscious delivery of a death blow and all it’s aftermath…and my old (ex) friend will not take it well.

One of the true gifts that come with getting older is the ability to simply say “Enough” and be done with it. No need to ponder where things go when they die and why it happened…just an acceptance that everything has a shelf life whether you like it or not. You might say, “My God, that’s so cynical” and you’re probably right but who still has every friend they ever made? My only issue is dealing with the drama and figuring out how to spare my (ex) friend’s feelings as best I can…I'm a lot of things (cynical, jaded, whatever) but I do not hurt people if it can be avoided.

This friend didn’t do any one thing that tipped the scale as it was more a growing apart over the last year. We have very different lives, interests and outlooks on life (I’m the optimist in the friendship…I’m offended that you actually laughed out loud!) so The expiration date was clearly printed on the label.

I’ve not ventured into my personal life on the blog yet but the shelf life concept seems to apply to the women I date as well. My luck as of late has been B-A-D and they’ve had the shelf life of fresh bread. It wasn’t always this way as I’ve dated a couple with Pop-Tart shelf life. I’d like to meet the right girl and find a relationship with Twinkie shelf life…My God, that’s d*mn near forever! Of course, Twinkies are bad for you but they definitely satisfy so maybe it’s true that you have to take the good with the bad. I was complaining about metaphors earlier and here I’ve taken this entry all the way into junk food symbolizing the perfect relationship.

Sometimes you just have to accept certain things for face value no matter how much you’d like a different outcome. One of the cruelest ironies of life is balance…for all the beauty and goodness you experience, it will be balanced by an equal amount of pain and sorrow. That doesn’t mean you stop searching for your Twinkie…it means you enjoy the fresh bread (for what it is) while you search.

Truth in advertising...

I was attempting to watch TV last night but it was commercial after commercial for political candidates…I swear there were more commercials than actual programming. I wouldn’t mind if they were Super Bowl quality as it might be worth my time to see how they could spin their positions into something funny and entertaining. The truth is there's nothing funny about any of them and their plans so guess their commercials should be equally uninspired! I would, however, like to see the idea below turned into a commercial.

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/27360516/?GT1=43001

Amy Borkowsky is trying to buy a Super Bowl ad to attract a man…the wrinkle is that it costs $3M and she’s a bit short (of the amount…not in height). For those who know me, they can attest to my continued bachelorhood in spite of all my efforts to find Ms. Right. I sympathize with her plight as I’ve had my fair share of mismatched set-ups (being single doesn’t make her perfect for me…), narcissists, super freaks and my personal favorite, “Like I could ever be interested in you…” girls who are holding out for Brad Pitt. For the last group, I often suggest a personal trainer, plastic surgery and a healthy dose of humility because no decent guy worth having would put up with that kind of self-absorbed bullsh*t.

Kudos to Amy as she seems grounded and realistic in her search….especially in evaluating what works for her:

“I’m not looking for Mr. Perfect,” she told a TODAY Show reporter Friday. “I’m looking for Mr. Perfect-for-Me.”

I’ve always advocated self-awareness and understanding of one’s self when looking for a partner because the “perfect by everyone else’s standard” person may not be the “perfect for you” person.

Now, what could ruin this great story…introducing Kathy Lee Gifford. Seems she has not disappeared into obscurity (as much as I had hoped she was gone from the public consciousness forever) but has a gig on the Today Show. In her typical asinine way, she fired off the following quote:

Gifford said, a bit sarcastically. “She’s probably a math whiz, too. I’m sorry, there’s a little bit of discrepancy between $1,000 and a million dollars. Give me her number. I will call her and talk to her. I am older and wiser now and I will talk to her.”

As a person who uses statistics every single day in my job, I have to ask, “What the hell’s wrong with being a math whiz?” When did being smart become a liability?

Of course, the idiocy continued as she proceeded to dispense some sage wisdom:

“She should go to her local church or her local synagogue or her local bowling alley and meet a nice guy who’s looking for a nice girl,” she said.

Huh? Local bowling alley? First, I’ve NEVER seen a bowling alley in Manhattan. Secondly, why would anyone take relationship advice from a woman who’s husband repeatedly cheated on her (he did some FREAKY things with his flight attendant mistress in case you forgot the sordid details) and then she stayed with him! Sorry Kathie Lee but your right to give advice on relationships expired at the moment you gave up your self-respect and last shred of dignity to keep a philandering husband for the dollars.

The other host of the show had equally awful advice:

“You don’t want someone who you’re going to meet on a Super Bowl ad,” Kotb added.

The second rule of dating is never discount the method/place you meet someone as you never know where “perfect for me” is going to pop up. To make a statement like the one above only confirms why the host is still single…you limit your choices then you limit your success. It’s as simple as that…

Maybe I’ll send her a few dollars as I applaud the initiative (don’t know that she’ll find her perfect person but I'm sure it will be a great story) because she's at least trying and that’s all you can really do at the end of the day…It’s all any of us can do.

If you want to contribute or just want to know more about Amy: superbowlsinglegirl.com (pass it on!)

Dear John...

Is it just me or have the Republicans all but conceded that McCain cannot win the election? The infighting and the "every man for himself" approach seems to be the order of the day across the entire party and most prominently with Sarah Palin.

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/10/25/mccain-aide-palin-going-rogue/#more-26388

Sarah Palin's political past is littered with those she befriended, used and then betrayed to build her own career. She has settled personal scores through her office, awarded contracts/jobs to the obviously under to non-qualified and basically charged Alaska for her expenses at every turn. McCain tapped her for the role to appeal to disenfranchised female voters and the ultra-conservative religious wing nuts that didn't trust him. He didn't vet her past or ask any pressing questions because he only saw the immediate goal of boosting his ratings among Republicans. A tag line was needed so they revived "Sarah Barracuda" but maybe he should have looked at her past a bit more closely to see that she is really "Sarah Piranha" looking for her next opportunity to promote herself as a presidential candidate in 2012. The McCain campaign has finally been clued into the joke and it's sobering punch line:

A second McCain source tells CNN she appears to now be looking out for herself more than the McCain campaign.
“She is a diva. She takes no advice from anyone,” said this McCain adviser, “she does not have any relationships of trust with any of us, her family or anyone else. Also she is playing for her own future and sees herself as the next leader of the party. Remember: divas trust only unto themselves as they see themselves as the beginning and end of all wisdom.”

I'm not against personal ambition as it’s what motivates people to achieve great things but you absolutely must have some level of proficiency in world affairs/politics to be President. The position requires our leader to have answers to very tough, ambiguous questions which affect millions of Americans and the perception of this country around the world. There are only 2 viewpoints on her qualifications (qualified/grossly unqualified) but I have great reservations with any candidate that can't answer basic questions:

A Palin associate defended her by saying she is “not good at process questions” and that her comments on Michigan and the robo calls were answers to process questions.

This type of "excuse" is unacceptable for a person seeking higher office...especially someone who is one step away from having to sit in the big chair and answer the tough questions without a script or coaching.

Let's put it on the table...John McCain is old and could potentially die in office elevating her to the Presidency. Maybe that's her take on the ticket...join now and if he dies in office then she becomes the President by default. The worst case is she gains the opportunity to get 4 years of experience “leading” the senate. Or maybe her goal has shifted to simply set the works in motion for a 2012 run against Obama because this election is already conceded? Only she knows the answer but I guarantee she will not be able to escape the difficult questions if she actually has to be elected President.

Update: New quote...seems I am not the only one thinking about McCain's age.

"Her numbers have plummeted in our poll ... what's more 55 percent think she's unqualified to serve as president if the need arises, which is a troublesome number given McCain's age," said NBC political director Chuck Todd.

Say it ain't so Joe...

It seems this campaign season is all about people named Joe...everyone from Joe Biden to Joe Six Pack to Joe the Plumber. Just when you think we can't squeeze in another Joe, we get this offering from Joe McCain:

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/politics/2008/10/24/mccain.brother.911.call.wjla

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081025/ap_on_el_pr/joe_mccain911

Seems this Joe has his brother's temper and decided that he was too important to wait in traffic with everyone else. Given his voice mail greeting, I might have to agree since he isn't available due to involvement in an "important family political project". His response to the VM is classic as he is angry that a lowly operator called him back to let him know his use of 911 was bordering on criminal. How dare that person call him...don't they know who he is?

After he cooled down, Joe did acknowledge it was a mistake but find his "apology" a bit lacking...Joe McCain said: "I feel terrible about having hurt the campaign over this incident. I won't be doing any more campaigning because of that." That's not really an apology and there is no sense of remorse for his actions outside of his fear that he may have hurt his brother's chances at becoming President. No worries Joe as I think John has done a fine job of torpedoing his own campaign and you’re not important enough to make a difference...even if you think you are.

Speaking of Joe the Plumber, it seems he is now actively considering a bid for Congress. Maybe he should check out the unscientific poll on CNN that shows 84% would NOT vote for him. Even though the poll isn’t statistically valid, it is a good barometer on the pulse of people in general and we are all saying (loudly) “Please go away….now!” Once the election is over, he will fade away into oblivion so maybe he better change his VM message to let the world know he is on “important political business” while he still has the opportunity.

Please don’t think I am against all people named Joe…quite the opposite. I happen to like quite a few people named Joe…like Joe Satriani, Joe Frazier and even Joe Piscapo on occasion. At least these guys are smart enough to know that simply being named Joe doesn’t make them qualified for public service. OK, somebody may need to call Piscapo...

T-minus 10 and counting...

Down to the final 10 days before the election (OK...11 days but I am so close to midnight I'll write off today) and the media blitz has been escalated to obscene levels. Both sides are bombarding the airwaves with ads and automated calls to the point that one news report indicated people were getting dozens of auto calls a day. I wasn't a poli-sci major at university but common sense should tell the campaigns that a dozen calls interrupting someone's life is probably not going to get them to vote for your candidate.

Maybe this is just another sign of how the candidates are not in touch with working America? I'm incredibly busy just trying to do more with less in this down economy and hold on to the job I have because there is no $150 million dollar savings account waiting for me. This is reality for all but the top 1% of America but we are being asked to choose between millionaires who really don't understand what it is like to lose sleep worrying about the future. I've been very fortunate in my life but know many who have not been and it angers me to see politicians playing on fears and spreading false promises simply to capture a vote.

I am especially disappointed in the McCain ads (and the larger Republican ad approach) for fostering suspicion and fear through half-truth and inferences all the while providing nothing positive to the race. I've always believed that if you have a strong position then you don't need to take cheap shots at your opponent. Of course, McCain is now taking cheap shots within his own party as he's claiming that W has been a total failure (On this point, I completely agree!) and that he will not be another George W if elected. The only problem here is that he has voted with W. over 90% of the time so it's a bit late for the feigned anger and demands for change. Is that what it means to be a maverick? You ride with the herd while your party is in power but when it suits your own self-interest, you decide to stand against the status quo. It's a bit short-sighted and much too late to have any impact for McCain as he is squarely aligned with W. even though he personally HATES the man.

The hate in their love/hate relationship was cemented in the SC primary in 2000. George attacked John in the most vile ways such as spreading the rumor that John had an illegitimate, black daughter (Fact Check: He adopted a child from another country. The race element was incredibly important in SC as old fears and hatred are never far from the surface) and this was the turning point that lead to George securing the nomination. Here's the irony of the situation, the John McCain of 2000 would have been an EXCELLENT leader for this country. He had bold ideas and was very much a moderate willing to compromise for the good of this nation...his biggest liability back then was his uncontrolled temper. The negativity of that campaign set the standard for future Republican campaigns and it has been repeatedly employed in this campaign. In another bit of irony, McCain now employs the same people who ran the negative, false ads against him during the 2000 campaign. They say politics makes for strange bed fellows but I would have a very hard time shaking the hands of anyone whose sole purpose eight year prior was to attack me and my family. Maybe it’s just another example of McCain becoming the man who defeated him in 2000.

Obama of Sherwood Forest

After carefully avoiding this pitfall for the entire campaign, Obama finally said the word that all conservatives have been patiently waiting to interject into the campaign. Ladies and Gentlemen, let’s talk about socialism. As my friends know, I am a fairly moderate to left leaning person even though I maintain no political affiliations but have no tolerance for socialistic policy in our current society. Here’s why…

Socialism (on paper) is designed to ensure that everyone shares in the wealth and that we all enjoy a better standard of living. The major flaw is that it assumes ALL people will work equally hard to achieve their goals and that’s just not true. There will always be people who want to do nothing (i.e. Welfare “lifers”, guests on Jerry Springer, etc.) which means a portion of the money you worked so hard to earn will be used to carry the slackers who are content to receive a handout. As a “producer”, I have a serious problem with this scenario! I’m all for helping out people when they need a hand (short term only) but do NOT believe in redistributing the wealth as it punishes those who took initiative and achieved success. The next step after socialist policy is the introduction of Marxist ideology and we all know how well Communism has worked out for Russia and China.

I’ve long held the belief of equilibrium in most aspects of life and the economic arena is no different. Think of it like this, if you are killing yourself to advance only to see a large portion of your success taken from you to be given to those who choose to do nothing then how long are you really going to continue down your current path? Probably not too long (and if you do then I have a rock that needs to be moved to the top of a hill…) so you start to slide closer to the center because you produce less. You might say that’s OK because the center is still pretty good but don’t forget that all of the other successful people are doing the same so the center begins to fall. As more people “give up” the center goes even lower and lower. The end condition is a welfare state where no one has a desire to innovate or produce anything because anyone who produces will be taxed at an obscene rate to cover the spread for those who do nothing. At this point, no one works and our civilization collapses under the weight of our own socialistic ideology.

I don’t think the introduction of the word “Socialism” into the campaign will cause any disruption to the Obama machine as the momentum is way too strong. On that point, I don’t think the Republicans are offering anything better…only a different strategy with the same ends of screwing the middle class over and leaving us with the hangover from their spending party. Socialism isn’t the answer in a free society because people have free will so it’s time to look for better answers than the Robin Hood mentality of taking from the rich to give to the poor.

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Jeez Andy, why couldn’t it be 15 seconds of fame?

I am consistently amazed by our ADD society and how anyone can have their 15 minutes of fame for something as simple as asking a question. Of course, I am talking about “Joe Plumber” and the incessant media coverage of both his life and views. Normally, this is expected and it dies out soon enough only to be a foot note in history or, at best, a trivial pursuit question that no one can answer. Quick, who was the woman in the Wendy’s commercial who said “Where’s the beef”? Smile if you answered Clara Peller…you’re either old or a nerd (or both)! For those wishing to revisit 1984 or have never heard of “Where’s the Beef” then click the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ug75diEyiA0

I have nothing against this guy especially since he’s determined to make more of himself than he is right now…that’s what everyone should be doing! I can even get past the fact the guy is working without a license (I believe that’s illegal…) and he owes the state of Ohio a few dollars in back taxes as it’s not the real issue. The real issue is that people are starting to think this guy is qualified to run for Congress! Since when did asking a question qualify a person to serve in a leadership position? It seems that a gentleman named Trevor Lair with the Massachusetts College Republicans is circulating an Internet petition to put this guy on the Ohio state ballot. His reasoning is that Samuel represents the “real-world perspective and the right attitude to clean up the mess on Capitol Hill”. Maybe Samuel has some hidden talent for politics but I’m guessing that installing toilets and faucets all day has not bestowed the man with any real insight into the inner working of the political machine or world events. Frankly, I see it a desperation move by the Republicans to try to relate to the people they have for so long stepped upon to benefit the top 1% of America. Maybe they believe the American people (or just the people of Ohio) are so superficial that we would vote for someone because they asked a question? Maybe people would vote for him but I’m quite sure they would quickly be made aware of his shortcomings when he stepped up to the podium in Washington…and then it’s too late. I’ve said for much of this campaign that if the Republicans want to show the American people that they are in touch with our needs then deliver a candidate that has solid, innovative, effective ideas to turn the country around and move it forward. Palin was a serious mistake and adding Joe Plumber to the mix only adds insult to injury. Even Sarah Palin has asked her handlers to forgo mentioning his name at rallies…maybe she’s afraid people will want Joe Plumber next to McCain instead of her? Either way, neither is qualified to lead this country even if they both love it and have the best intentions at heart. For people’s comments on Joe’s bid for Congress, click the link: http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/10/17/campaign-to-%e2%80%98plunge-the-crap-out-of-washington%e2%80%99/#comments

For those that think I am solidly against the republicans, your wrong…I just haven’t had time to write about the Democrats yet but will very soon. The political slant of my blog will shift once the election is over so bear with me. Until next time…

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10-19-2008 Update: Seems Joe is angry with the continued media attention and their deep dive into his shallow life. He wants them to go away and let him live in peace...Hey Joe, that might happen if you'd stop granting interviews and not agree to appear with McCain on the campaign trail. Common sense...

Wisdom of Floyd

Seems everyone is fascinated with Sarah Palin and the idea that she could some day become the President of the United States. Maybe it's her folksy, down-home schtick or the idea that she's "one of the people" who can relate to the average Joe Six Pack working a job that he hates to make a meager wage just to get up tomorrow and do it all again? She does have the folksy, down-home thing happening but so did Floyd the barber on the Andy Griffith show! Before anyone hates me for bringing Floyd into the discussion, he's one of my favorite characters on the show (Barney still made that show...it's true). There are certain qualities I want in the leader of the greatest country in the free world and folksy, down-home sayings isn't one of them! Forgive me for wanting some substance and not the rheotic/hate mongering speeches that are currently defining McCain's campaign. It's a sad testament that it has become about attacks and not an examination of who is best suited to lead our country...but that's not how politics is currently played and our country is the worse for it.

For the past eight years, I have cringed every single time I've seen W. on television representing our country. He has done more damage to our world reputation than anyone I can remember and I see a lot of him in Palin. The cluelessness when he doesn't have a script, the pandering to the religious right (and their goal to impose their will on everyone!) and the thought that war solves all issues with other countries. Seems we are being asked to trade the Wild West approach for the Frontier approach and neither is what we need to rebuild this country. We need strong leadership and I seriously do not think it is possible in our current political system.

Floyd once said "never accept a wooden nickel" and Sarah Palin is a wooden nickel. You betcha!

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First meetings warrant an introduction...

Welcome to the first installment of my new blog!

Why blog? My friend asked that question when I first disclosed my intention to start this little experiment. Not sure I have a solid answer but probably because of my love for composition (my undergrad degree is in English) and I've been away from my creative side for too long. The intent of this blog is to provide a snap shot of the things happening in my life as well as a place to post some opinions on current events/people/relationships/politics/everything.

Who am I? I'm an average guy working a normal professional job trying to make it to my so-called retirement while having a bit of fun along the way. I'm not affliated with any political party (all are fair game for my opinions) and like to think my viewpoints are based in logic/reason and a healthy dose of common sense. Not going to give you all the details now (that's what future posts are for!) so let's move on and get started...

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