Should I stay or should I go?

I’ve always held that certain things happen at exactly the right moment for a reason. I’m pretty clueless about the reason but it’s usually to teach me a lesson, open my eyes to the obvious or, in some cases, just to make me think.

I’ve been on the fence about moving to Asheville so it was time for a sign giving me some direction. It’s 80% “go” on the move but that last 20% is proving to be quite a challenge to overcome. I needed a sign…got one.

My story begins on a beautiful Friday morning as I was out running errands. I’d taken the day off work and decided to get new tires for the car so made a trip up the road to Mooresville. Always one to maximize efficiency, I also planned to stop at the Super Target next door to pick up a few random items.

I’m moving through the ST with shopping list in hand (super chunk peanut butter, mattress pad and a duffel bag) to keep me focused but I still got distracted. Somehow I ended up in the produce section where I saw HER. By her, I don’t mean the Future Ex-Mrs. Esc but the Past Almost Mrs. Esc Ex. It was a chance encounter six years in the making as she stood there with her Starbucks with me staring back holding a bunch of bananas. For a moment, I knew exactly how those deer feel when they wander out onto the Interstate after dark and get caught in the headlights...you just stand there unable to move even though you know you NEED to move.

This chance encounter was always destined to happen as we only live one town apart and shop in exactly the same places. It had been six years since our last meeting and I’d purposely started avoiding her part of town once a mutual friend told me she made the move. But today was supposed to be a “safe” day….she never takes days off as her love of work is almost on the same level as the way people love their kids! After rolling the dice for years, today was my day to crap out.

This whole situation raised a question we’ve all had to deal with at one point or another…”What do you say to an ex during that chance meeting?” I know a lot depends on how it ended but after six years neither should harbor any ill will or strong feelings. The high road would be a cordial (but oh so brief) conversation about meaningless things and how great life is at this very moment. The low road would probably be reduced to single words such as “Bitch” or “Bastard” accompanied by an evil scowl or look of disgust. In our most perfect moment, we took neither road and simply passed without saying a word.

I thought about it afterwards and wondered what I would have said if she had spoken. What if she asked about my personal life/status? Do you tell the truth about your current situation or make up the life you really wish you had? What do say to a person you spent 10 years with that doesn’t come off sounding like a veiled attempt to validate life is so much better without them? I guess the path of silence was really the high road after all.

I saw a sign that day and it said, “Bananas…$.29 a lb”. I also saw a sign that said “Now is a great time to go live somewhere else”. I guess I got more than a great deal on bananas.