I’ve never been known as indecisive or afraid of a challenge…especially if the odds are against my success. Throughout my life, people have always told me I couldn’t achieve or I wasn’t smart enough, good enough, resourceful enough, etc. to overcome the odds. It’s made every success that much better knowing I “stuck it” to the haters and proved them wrong. I set the bar high for all my endeavors and rarely, if ever, conceded defeat.
One of the most dominant components of my personality is the underdog determination to succeed at all costs and push myself far beyond the boundaries of my limits. This trait has served me well but I often don’t know when to simply walk away from a challenge. I’m not advocating quitting (i.e. The Palin technique) but knowing when to say “Enough…the effort isn’t worth the reward”. I finally reached that point with dating so I’m officially reaching acceptance of my single status and no longer actively pursuing activities to change this status.
What? Esc giving up on dating? Not exactly…I’m just giving up on the futile online searching, speed dating events, etc. and settling into my life. If I meet a nice girl out and about then “game on” but no more hours spent searching through profiles that have never met the truth or going to events that just seem to recycle the same old crowd. I’ve reached a point in life where I can honestly say, “Enough…time to move on and live my life even if it means living it solo from here on out”.
This revelation has been months in the making but I've embraced acceptance which is the first step towards moving on. I’ve spent far too many years being less than happy and it was time for a change…even if it meant admitting that I failed to achieve my goal. The Road to Acceptance (Pardon the reference to a Green Day song but this one is back in the day when they were actually cool) is different for everyone…here’s my path:
1) I’ve started doing a lot more things that I’ve never done before like going out for breakfast every weekend, planning trips for one, etc. The breakfast thing was a bit awkward at first but now it feels completely natural and normal. I used to avoid places with all the happy couples but now I just go and do my own thing.
2) Set new goals to fill the void (and my free time). The new goals are all around my cycling and I’m breaking through plateaus that a year ago I wouldn’t have even considered possible. Yes, I’m logging a lot of saddle time (which leads to plenty of time to think) but I’m not consumed with thoughts about why I can’t seem to meet anyone (or why the ones I do meet just don’t seem to fit).
3) Cut off the Internet searches and websites…especially The Fish!
The Fish is the place where the desperate end up after all the pay sites have failed to produce anything other than laughs, sighs of frustration and the general sense that you're completely alone in the universe. While I have a love/hate relationship with The Fish!, I knew I had to scan the site one last time.
Long time readers (or anyone savvy enough to use the right hand menu to look up old entries) will remember the last dating disaster with MM and then the subsequent posting to The Fish looking for exactly what she had in Esc. I’ve become accustomed to seeing people I didn’t expect out there but I found something quite unexpected today!
The final search brought up a profile for Delilah (aka The Witness Protection date)! This find was most unexpected but I’m truly happy to see that she’s free and clear of the program and able to live a full and complete life. For those who don’t know, this was my experiment with dating outside of my usual “type” that ended with her completely disappearing off the face of the earth. I spent weeks (not really) blaming myself for her entrance into witness protection and ruining her life! If I had a dollar for every woman who said I ruined her life, I’d have $3.
(Note to EP and the Dietz: Since you know Delilah, I have one word about revealing the blog contents: DISCRETION. I’d hate to have to post a link to a certain video.)
Maybe things would be different with Delilah now as spending a few months with MM got me back into the swing of dating but we’ll never know as I don’t live in the past and I’ve got no time to re-tread old ground. The rest of my life is waiting and I intend to live it out loud and to the fullest….even if that means living it alone. No regrets...
Showing posts with label My life.... Show all posts
Showing posts with label My life.... Show all posts
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Friday, December 25, 2009
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas!
I know I've been absent for far too long but I don't have as much free time as before. You see, I met this girl and she continues to say "yes" to my date requests so spending all my time trying to figure out things to do, places to go and finding new restaurants that take American Express. I never knew it could be so time consuming to make someone think you just thought of something to do off the top of your head!
She's been impressed so far and I'd hate for her to discover the awful truth that I'm not as smooth and sophisticated as I appear. Clever and charming fascade please hold out for a bit longer...PLEASE!!!!
Anyway...I'll try to do a better job with the blog in 2010!
I know I've been absent for far too long but I don't have as much free time as before. You see, I met this girl and she continues to say "yes" to my date requests so spending all my time trying to figure out things to do, places to go and finding new restaurants that take American Express. I never knew it could be so time consuming to make someone think you just thought of something to do off the top of your head!
She's been impressed so far and I'd hate for her to discover the awful truth that I'm not as smooth and sophisticated as I appear. Clever and charming fascade please hold out for a bit longer...PLEASE!!!!
Anyway...I'll try to do a better job with the blog in 2010!
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Things I love...
I love a lot of things…like a glass of perfectly dry Cabernet, Thai food, lounging around in the hammock on a nice day, riding my bikes and living near a college town. What? How did living near a college town make the list? Let me explain.
My physical address puts me in Cornelius but I live four miles from the Davidson College campus. While four miles may not seem far, it’s a world away from Cornelius in a great many ways. Davidson is one of those liberal college towns where nothing exciting ever happens…until now.
It’s a beautiful fall day and I’m stopped at the light in the center of town. I make the left turn onto Main St. passing by the quaint shops and people just walking to be outside. Fortunately, I get caught by the next stop light in front of the Ben and Jerry’s. Normally, I hate missing this light but I’d miss it every time if “they” were there.
I saw a small group of college students walking towards the light and thought nothing of it until I saw the two tall, very attractive girls. As they got closer, I noticed they had their arms around each other (in a more than friend’s kind of way). When they reached the Ben and Jerry’s, they stopped and proceeded to make out (to the horror of the old people sitting in the rocking chairs). I don’t mean a peck on the cheek but full-on action!
After two rotations of the light, the cars behind me starting honking the horn but I wasn’t moving…no way these people were going to ruin this for me. I was definitely feeling the moment (and I think the guy in the truck behind me was feeling something else a little more personal...Dude, not cool!) so had to stay for the whole, wonderful show. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen two girls make out but usually, hot girl-on-girl action is followed by the need to enter a credit card number and a check of the anti-virus software. Having witnessed this greatness, my day was complete.
A lot of people say things like “I love life” and “I’m in love with love”. That’s all fine and good but find that my list of things I love is a bit less cultured…especially since I added “hot girls making out in front of the Ben and Jerry’s In Davidson NC” to the list.
My physical address puts me in Cornelius but I live four miles from the Davidson College campus. While four miles may not seem far, it’s a world away from Cornelius in a great many ways. Davidson is one of those liberal college towns where nothing exciting ever happens…until now.
It’s a beautiful fall day and I’m stopped at the light in the center of town. I make the left turn onto Main St. passing by the quaint shops and people just walking to be outside. Fortunately, I get caught by the next stop light in front of the Ben and Jerry’s. Normally, I hate missing this light but I’d miss it every time if “they” were there.
I saw a small group of college students walking towards the light and thought nothing of it until I saw the two tall, very attractive girls. As they got closer, I noticed they had their arms around each other (in a more than friend’s kind of way). When they reached the Ben and Jerry’s, they stopped and proceeded to make out (to the horror of the old people sitting in the rocking chairs). I don’t mean a peck on the cheek but full-on action!
After two rotations of the light, the cars behind me starting honking the horn but I wasn’t moving…no way these people were going to ruin this for me. I was definitely feeling the moment (and I think the guy in the truck behind me was feeling something else a little more personal...Dude, not cool!) so had to stay for the whole, wonderful show. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen two girls make out but usually, hot girl-on-girl action is followed by the need to enter a credit card number and a check of the anti-virus software. Having witnessed this greatness, my day was complete.
A lot of people say things like “I love life” and “I’m in love with love”. That’s all fine and good but find that my list of things I love is a bit less cultured…especially since I added “hot girls making out in front of the Ben and Jerry’s In Davidson NC” to the list.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Stop playing by the rules…
There are some golden rules that are just not meant to be broken…like don’t tug on Superman’s cape, don’t spit into the wind or don’t eat the yellow snow. Probably the most important of the “never to be broken” rules is never, never, never date a co-worker! It’s just a disaster waiting to happen and then you’re out looking for a new girlfriend AND a new job. No thanks…
While it’s probably smart to avoid the pitfalls of office dating, let’s face it, guys aren’t that smart and we will break any rule to get what we want (and we all know what guys want). Its tough meeting women but the office provides a captive audience and plenty of opportunities to strike up a conversation. Plus, women at the office can “pre-qualify” you because they can see your place on the corporate ladder, determine your advancement potential, rate your potential to make all the other women envious if they dated you (never underestimate the power of jealousy among women), etc.
I’ve never dated a co-worker in my professional career so not even sure how I’d approach that special someone for the big question. I mentioned my hesitance to date a co-worker to GP once (he laughed) and he proceeded to regale me with tales of his prowess managing “relationships” with several women in the office pool. It was like hearing stories of the conquistadores looting and pillaging across the land…absolutely what a guy on the fence wants to hear! (Thanks GP)
Now that’s all fine and good if you’ve got some decent game but I have none….my game score is lower than the temperature during a Canadian winter. Outside of being a bit shy and socially awkward, I have no approach, no opening lines and am about as interesting as a physics lecture. What’s a guy to do to land that date with a co-worker with all these “handicaps”? I consulted the experts on how to start it?
The only problem with actually getting the date is the knowledge of the inevitable break-up that will surely occur (usually at the worst time). For the most part, breaking up can be handled with minimal disruption to your life if you follow some simple rules. But an office based break-up is something totally different all together because you WILL see this person every day. That’s a daunting prospect so better consult the experts again for advice on how to end it .
Given that I’ve had no luck in finding the Future Ex-Mrs. Esc these past 6 years or so, maybe I should break the rules and pursue an office romance. It the perfect plan except, I work from home 5 days a week. Oh well, guess its back to "Plan B".
While it’s probably smart to avoid the pitfalls of office dating, let’s face it, guys aren’t that smart and we will break any rule to get what we want (and we all know what guys want). Its tough meeting women but the office provides a captive audience and plenty of opportunities to strike up a conversation. Plus, women at the office can “pre-qualify” you because they can see your place on the corporate ladder, determine your advancement potential, rate your potential to make all the other women envious if they dated you (never underestimate the power of jealousy among women), etc.
I’ve never dated a co-worker in my professional career so not even sure how I’d approach that special someone for the big question. I mentioned my hesitance to date a co-worker to GP once (he laughed) and he proceeded to regale me with tales of his prowess managing “relationships” with several women in the office pool. It was like hearing stories of the conquistadores looting and pillaging across the land…absolutely what a guy on the fence wants to hear! (Thanks GP)
Now that’s all fine and good if you’ve got some decent game but I have none….my game score is lower than the temperature during a Canadian winter. Outside of being a bit shy and socially awkward, I have no approach, no opening lines and am about as interesting as a physics lecture. What’s a guy to do to land that date with a co-worker with all these “handicaps”? I consulted the experts on how to start it?
The only problem with actually getting the date is the knowledge of the inevitable break-up that will surely occur (usually at the worst time). For the most part, breaking up can be handled with minimal disruption to your life if you follow some simple rules. But an office based break-up is something totally different all together because you WILL see this person every day. That’s a daunting prospect so better consult the experts again for advice on how to end it .
Given that I’ve had no luck in finding the Future Ex-Mrs. Esc these past 6 years or so, maybe I should break the rules and pursue an office romance. It the perfect plan except, I work from home 5 days a week. Oh well, guess its back to "Plan B".
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Should I stay or should I go?
I’ve always held that certain things happen at exactly the right moment for a reason. I’m pretty clueless about the reason but it’s usually to teach me a lesson, open my eyes to the obvious or, in some cases, just to make me think.
I’ve been on the fence about moving to Asheville so it was time for a sign giving me some direction. It’s 80% “go” on the move but that last 20% is proving to be quite a challenge to overcome. I needed a sign…got one.
My story begins on a beautiful Friday morning as I was out running errands. I’d taken the day off work and decided to get new tires for the car so made a trip up the road to Mooresville. Always one to maximize efficiency, I also planned to stop at the Super Target next door to pick up a few random items.
I’m moving through the ST with shopping list in hand (super chunk peanut butter, mattress pad and a duffel bag) to keep me focused but I still got distracted. Somehow I ended up in the produce section where I saw HER. By her, I don’t mean the Future Ex-Mrs. Esc but the Past Almost Mrs. Esc Ex. It was a chance encounter six years in the making as she stood there with her Starbucks with me staring back holding a bunch of bananas. For a moment, I knew exactly how those deer feel when they wander out onto the Interstate after dark and get caught in the headlights...you just stand there unable to move even though you know you NEED to move.
This chance encounter was always destined to happen as we only live one town apart and shop in exactly the same places. It had been six years since our last meeting and I’d purposely started avoiding her part of town once a mutual friend told me she made the move. But today was supposed to be a “safe” day….she never takes days off as her love of work is almost on the same level as the way people love their kids! After rolling the dice for years, today was my day to crap out.
This whole situation raised a question we’ve all had to deal with at one point or another…”What do you say to an ex during that chance meeting?” I know a lot depends on how it ended but after six years neither should harbor any ill will or strong feelings. The high road would be a cordial (but oh so brief) conversation about meaningless things and how great life is at this very moment. The low road would probably be reduced to single words such as “Bitch” or “Bastard” accompanied by an evil scowl or look of disgust. In our most perfect moment, we took neither road and simply passed without saying a word.
I thought about it afterwards and wondered what I would have said if she had spoken. What if she asked about my personal life/status? Do you tell the truth about your current situation or make up the life you really wish you had? What do say to a person you spent 10 years with that doesn’t come off sounding like a veiled attempt to validate life is so much better without them? I guess the path of silence was really the high road after all.
I saw a sign that day and it said, “Bananas…$.29 a lb”. I also saw a sign that said “Now is a great time to go live somewhere else”. I guess I got more than a great deal on bananas.
I’ve been on the fence about moving to Asheville so it was time for a sign giving me some direction. It’s 80% “go” on the move but that last 20% is proving to be quite a challenge to overcome. I needed a sign…got one.
My story begins on a beautiful Friday morning as I was out running errands. I’d taken the day off work and decided to get new tires for the car so made a trip up the road to Mooresville. Always one to maximize efficiency, I also planned to stop at the Super Target next door to pick up a few random items.
I’m moving through the ST with shopping list in hand (super chunk peanut butter, mattress pad and a duffel bag) to keep me focused but I still got distracted. Somehow I ended up in the produce section where I saw HER. By her, I don’t mean the Future Ex-Mrs. Esc but the Past Almost Mrs. Esc Ex. It was a chance encounter six years in the making as she stood there with her Starbucks with me staring back holding a bunch of bananas. For a moment, I knew exactly how those deer feel when they wander out onto the Interstate after dark and get caught in the headlights...you just stand there unable to move even though you know you NEED to move.
This chance encounter was always destined to happen as we only live one town apart and shop in exactly the same places. It had been six years since our last meeting and I’d purposely started avoiding her part of town once a mutual friend told me she made the move. But today was supposed to be a “safe” day….she never takes days off as her love of work is almost on the same level as the way people love their kids! After rolling the dice for years, today was my day to crap out.
This whole situation raised a question we’ve all had to deal with at one point or another…”What do you say to an ex during that chance meeting?” I know a lot depends on how it ended but after six years neither should harbor any ill will or strong feelings. The high road would be a cordial (but oh so brief) conversation about meaningless things and how great life is at this very moment. The low road would probably be reduced to single words such as “Bitch” or “Bastard” accompanied by an evil scowl or look of disgust. In our most perfect moment, we took neither road and simply passed without saying a word.
I thought about it afterwards and wondered what I would have said if she had spoken. What if she asked about my personal life/status? Do you tell the truth about your current situation or make up the life you really wish you had? What do say to a person you spent 10 years with that doesn’t come off sounding like a veiled attempt to validate life is so much better without them? I guess the path of silence was really the high road after all.
I saw a sign that day and it said, “Bananas…$.29 a lb”. I also saw a sign that said “Now is a great time to go live somewhere else”. I guess I got more than a great deal on bananas.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
One step closer...
In my last entry, I mentioned the one big “if” was selling my house. Well, there was another big “if”...whether work would be willing to let me flee Charlotte and still stay among the employed at XYZ Corporation. Without a job, the whole adventure would be a no go as I have virtually no hope of finding work in Asheville. Everything was riding on the outcome of the conversation.
I’m a “planner” (even when it seems like I’m being spontaneous) so I had this whole conversation in my head complete with selling points to counter any resistance. I brought up the topic with my manager and his reply, “No problem…I’ve heard Asheville is very nice”. Another hurdle down…
Now the only big “if” remaining is selling the house. Once it’s sold, adios Charlotte!
I’m a “planner” (even when it seems like I’m being spontaneous) so I had this whole conversation in my head complete with selling points to counter any resistance. I brought up the topic with my manager and his reply, “No problem…I’ve heard Asheville is very nice”. Another hurdle down…
Now the only big “if” remaining is selling the house. Once it’s sold, adios Charlotte!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Esc poised to escape???
I’ve never been one for indecision but I’ve been contemplating a somewhat big decision for quite some time with no resolution. The pendulum swings way out to one side only to work its way back towards the center (status quo). There are a lot of factors to consider but I think I received a significant push away from the center today. The pendulum seems to be stuck over on “Go….NOW!”
I’ve always had a sense of restlessness and felt out-of-place…even in my own house. When I was a kid, I used to think about how my life could be so different (maybe better?) if I was only somewhere else. Given that I grew up in [name redacted], that’s not really a huge leap of faith to KNOW my life would have been better almost anywhere else. I can remember when people would move to the next town and others would be so envious they “got out”. It was suburban Alcatraz and I spent my days scavenging for old rain coats and glue to build my raft to freedom. Given how I felt in my formative years, it’s no surprise now that I’m feeling the undeniable urge to pull up stakes and start over some where else. The target destination is not yet finalized but the front runner is Asheville, NC.
Charlotte is not a bad place but it’s becoming more apparent everyday that’s it’s not the place for me. Maybe if I could meet a nice girl here I’d probably stay but, after 7 years, I seriously doubt any of “The One’s” resides anywhere near 28031. If they do, they must all be working undercover as other people’s girlfriend/wife as my last date was months ago with nothing on the horizon.
On some levels, a move to a new city gives me a chance to re-invent myself. I could be the person I’ve always wanted to be….shallow, vain and totally popular! Who am I kidding…I’ll never be popular but I’ve got some serious potential for the other two! Meatloaf was right when he said “two out of three ain’t bad”. I’d love to believe a new ZIP code could make everything perfect but I’m not so naïve as to think it would make me any less shy, socially awkward and neurotic (only plastic surgery can turn me into everything I ever wanted to be : )
The big “if” right now is selling my house. I bought into the whole “buy a house” racket so now I’m trying to figure out how to cash out of the suburban dream. I don’t regret buying my house because, at the time, it was never supposed to be just me. I look back and laugh (now) because it was the single worst time of my entire life yet I still had this unwavering hope that all would be OK. I should really place blame where it truly lies…with Milton Bradley. Had the relationship Magic 8-Ball been on target, I’d probably have rented a room at a hotel (on a weekly option) and spent the down payment on a Porsche.
I’ll be leaving some things here I’d like to take with me when/if I move but sometimes you have to take your chances on the unknown to find your happiness. Maybe I’ll succeed or I could fail miserably but I don’t ever want to feel the sting of bitter regret for never taking the chance. I’ve failed at everything I’ve every attempted but I’m not a failure…just experienced. One thing is true no matter how many times I fail, I’ll get back up to try again and I’ll never lose the hope that something better is right around the corner.
I’ve always had a sense of restlessness and felt out-of-place…even in my own house. When I was a kid, I used to think about how my life could be so different (maybe better?) if I was only somewhere else. Given that I grew up in [name redacted], that’s not really a huge leap of faith to KNOW my life would have been better almost anywhere else. I can remember when people would move to the next town and others would be so envious they “got out”. It was suburban Alcatraz and I spent my days scavenging for old rain coats and glue to build my raft to freedom. Given how I felt in my formative years, it’s no surprise now that I’m feeling the undeniable urge to pull up stakes and start over some where else. The target destination is not yet finalized but the front runner is Asheville, NC.
Charlotte is not a bad place but it’s becoming more apparent everyday that’s it’s not the place for me. Maybe if I could meet a nice girl here I’d probably stay but, after 7 years, I seriously doubt any of “The One’s” resides anywhere near 28031. If they do, they must all be working undercover as other people’s girlfriend/wife as my last date was months ago with nothing on the horizon.
On some levels, a move to a new city gives me a chance to re-invent myself. I could be the person I’ve always wanted to be….shallow, vain and totally popular! Who am I kidding…I’ll never be popular but I’ve got some serious potential for the other two! Meatloaf was right when he said “two out of three ain’t bad”. I’d love to believe a new ZIP code could make everything perfect but I’m not so naïve as to think it would make me any less shy, socially awkward and neurotic (only plastic surgery can turn me into everything I ever wanted to be : )
The big “if” right now is selling my house. I bought into the whole “buy a house” racket so now I’m trying to figure out how to cash out of the suburban dream. I don’t regret buying my house because, at the time, it was never supposed to be just me. I look back and laugh (now) because it was the single worst time of my entire life yet I still had this unwavering hope that all would be OK. I should really place blame where it truly lies…with Milton Bradley. Had the relationship Magic 8-Ball been on target, I’d probably have rented a room at a hotel (on a weekly option) and spent the down payment on a Porsche.
I’ll be leaving some things here I’d like to take with me when/if I move but sometimes you have to take your chances on the unknown to find your happiness. Maybe I’ll succeed or I could fail miserably but I don’t ever want to feel the sting of bitter regret for never taking the chance. I’ve failed at everything I’ve every attempted but I’m not a failure…just experienced. One thing is true no matter how many times I fail, I’ll get back up to try again and I’ll never lose the hope that something better is right around the corner.
Monday, July 13, 2009
Bumper Sticker Wisdom…
I received a call the other day from the Wisnerd and his opening line pretty much set the tone of the call…”OMG, you’re just not going to believe this”. He often starts his calls this way and never fails to deliver the goods as the most weird, unusual, improbable things happen to him. In keeping with past experience, he didn’t disappoint this time.
One thing you have to know about him is how much he stresses about money… I don’t mean worries a bit when things get tight but becomes completely obsessed with the topic to the point of developing all these plans like cashing in life insurance policies, selling furniture, etc. I’ll spare you all the details of the call but it seems he cashed out a life insurance policy to pay down some credit card debt only to discover the wife had gone behind his back and spent $1400 on botox injections (on the very card he was trying to pay down). Not sure I’ll ever know what it’s like to realize your life’s value (or at least policy face value) has been reduced to a temporary cosmetic procedure but quite positive it’s not something anyone really wants to experience.
In the course of our conversation, he mentioned his lack of “options” and how he was “stuck” in a relationship with no exit. It’s on this point I have to disagree because we have options in every situation…they may not be pleasant but we always have options. I’ve always marveled at how easily people give up or simply accept a situation without opening their minds to all the possibilities. It’s this acceptance that makes people believe they have no options when, in reality, they simply lack the will to act or the courage to “suffer” through the negative aspects of the other options.
Those calls always make me think about things in my own life (like how much I truly enjoy being single….or at least not married to someone who’s devoted her life to ruining mine) and times I’ve taken the easy way out for fear of the challenge/change. There is one defining moment in my life where I failed to act and I keep it in that deep, dark place inside to remind me fear of failure never stings as bitterly as regret.
I was thinking about the whole Wisnerd situation when I saw a truck with a bumper sticker proclaiming “Screw it…Live a little”. Most bumper stickers are stupid or boring but this one was right on the money. Life is too short to stay in a bad situation believing you have no other possibilities so figure out what you want and go get it! Maybe some people are content with living a little but I say "Screw it…live a LOT!”
One thing you have to know about him is how much he stresses about money… I don’t mean worries a bit when things get tight but becomes completely obsessed with the topic to the point of developing all these plans like cashing in life insurance policies, selling furniture, etc. I’ll spare you all the details of the call but it seems he cashed out a life insurance policy to pay down some credit card debt only to discover the wife had gone behind his back and spent $1400 on botox injections (on the very card he was trying to pay down). Not sure I’ll ever know what it’s like to realize your life’s value (or at least policy face value) has been reduced to a temporary cosmetic procedure but quite positive it’s not something anyone really wants to experience.
In the course of our conversation, he mentioned his lack of “options” and how he was “stuck” in a relationship with no exit. It’s on this point I have to disagree because we have options in every situation…they may not be pleasant but we always have options. I’ve always marveled at how easily people give up or simply accept a situation without opening their minds to all the possibilities. It’s this acceptance that makes people believe they have no options when, in reality, they simply lack the will to act or the courage to “suffer” through the negative aspects of the other options.
Those calls always make me think about things in my own life (like how much I truly enjoy being single….or at least not married to someone who’s devoted her life to ruining mine) and times I’ve taken the easy way out for fear of the challenge/change. There is one defining moment in my life where I failed to act and I keep it in that deep, dark place inside to remind me fear of failure never stings as bitterly as regret.
I was thinking about the whole Wisnerd situation when I saw a truck with a bumper sticker proclaiming “Screw it…Live a little”. Most bumper stickers are stupid or boring but this one was right on the money. Life is too short to stay in a bad situation believing you have no other possibilities so figure out what you want and go get it! Maybe some people are content with living a little but I say "Screw it…live a LOT!”
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Slacker...
I'm not usually so slack as to go weeks without updating the blog but here I am staring at ZERO entries for July. It's not that I don't have anything to say (quite the opposite...as usual) but short on time. The usual suspects (work, work, work) and a couple of other unexpected things (all good...don't get excited as none of them are dates) but planning to update this week so get ready! : )
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
We are Motorhead…and we play Rock n’ Roll!
You’ve probably all seen (or maybe even read) one of those books on the 1000 places to visit before you die. That’s all fine and good if you’re rich and want to see really weird places but what about the 1000 things you should do before you die?
I’m sure the list would be unique to everyone but I’ve got an entry that should probably be on everyone’s list…seeing a live Motorhead show! I was lucky enough to catch them last year in NYC so checked that one off the list but swore I’d see them again…maybe even at the Wacken Festival.
Motorhead is a touring band and I was disappointed to see no US tour dates. My mind started to think about a trip to the UK to see them in Manchester (very cool!) but they are playing on Thanksgiving Day (bummer). Add in the fact I’ve made no travel plans and need to conserve cash for a trip out to SD later this year. As one who never gives up, I kept checking the page hoping for a break.
The break arrived this past Sunday as Motorhead announced a tour stop in Charlotte NC! Yes, the lads are going to be in my town for one night only and yours truly will be there to put a second check mark next to “See a live Motorhead show” on my life list. Tickets go on sale Friday at 10 AM EST and I plan to be in queue early to get my tickets.
Of course, I told the Wisnerd and he did exactly what I expected…started off excited and then started to find reasons to back out. I’d normally try to convince him but this time is different as I’ll go alone if I have to because I have to see the show. I wont be going alone this time even if the Wisnerd backs out…and my party guests will make the trip interesting indeed.
My neighbor (Solly) is also a Motorhead fan so picking up tickets for him. At his suggestion, I’ll be picking up a few extras as he knows several strippers who’d like to attend the show as well! Maybe I shouldn’t get a ticket for the Wisnerd as it means one less stripper for the group. Tough choice…could go either way!
The goal of the stripper entourage (besides hanging out with girls who take of their clothes at the drop of a hat) is to get us invited to the after party. Item 4 on the life list is to attend a Motorhead show but item number 3 is to party with the band (and get my picture made with Lemmy). I’ll do my part by getting the tickets and they can do their part by getting us all invited to the party. Sounds like a fair trade to me.
If you can’t make it to a show (with or without a stripper entourage), I highly recommend their concert DVD as it truly captures as much of the energy of the show as possible. The camera work is stellar as is the sound (only slightly edging out Tio’s Game for cinematography…nod to the GP!) and a steal at $15.
I’ll be a middle-aged guy at a rock concert but that’s OK because I may be getting older but I’m not dead…yet. I’ll continue putting checks next to the box as long as I can because they are Motorhead…and yes, they play Rock n’ Roll!
I’m sure the list would be unique to everyone but I’ve got an entry that should probably be on everyone’s list…seeing a live Motorhead show! I was lucky enough to catch them last year in NYC so checked that one off the list but swore I’d see them again…maybe even at the Wacken Festival.
Motorhead is a touring band and I was disappointed to see no US tour dates. My mind started to think about a trip to the UK to see them in Manchester (very cool!) but they are playing on Thanksgiving Day (bummer). Add in the fact I’ve made no travel plans and need to conserve cash for a trip out to SD later this year. As one who never gives up, I kept checking the page hoping for a break.
The break arrived this past Sunday as Motorhead announced a tour stop in Charlotte NC! Yes, the lads are going to be in my town for one night only and yours truly will be there to put a second check mark next to “See a live Motorhead show” on my life list. Tickets go on sale Friday at 10 AM EST and I plan to be in queue early to get my tickets.
Of course, I told the Wisnerd and he did exactly what I expected…started off excited and then started to find reasons to back out. I’d normally try to convince him but this time is different as I’ll go alone if I have to because I have to see the show. I wont be going alone this time even if the Wisnerd backs out…and my party guests will make the trip interesting indeed.
My neighbor (Solly) is also a Motorhead fan so picking up tickets for him. At his suggestion, I’ll be picking up a few extras as he knows several strippers who’d like to attend the show as well! Maybe I shouldn’t get a ticket for the Wisnerd as it means one less stripper for the group. Tough choice…could go either way!
The goal of the stripper entourage (besides hanging out with girls who take of their clothes at the drop of a hat) is to get us invited to the after party. Item 4 on the life list is to attend a Motorhead show but item number 3 is to party with the band (and get my picture made with Lemmy). I’ll do my part by getting the tickets and they can do their part by getting us all invited to the party. Sounds like a fair trade to me.
If you can’t make it to a show (with or without a stripper entourage), I highly recommend their concert DVD as it truly captures as much of the energy of the show as possible. The camera work is stellar as is the sound (only slightly edging out Tio’s Game for cinematography…nod to the GP!) and a steal at $15.
I’ll be a middle-aged guy at a rock concert but that’s OK because I may be getting older but I’m not dead…yet. I’ll continue putting checks next to the box as long as I can because they are Motorhead…and yes, they play Rock n’ Roll!
Sunday, May 17, 2009
And then there was one…
(Sorry for the delay in posting but had to deal with some of life’s little complications. Since none of them involve anything close to the words “won the lottery” or “you have to do my hot friend too” I’m not going to bother explaining)
Friendship…The ability to share a common interest(s) with others and the sense of connection make us all feel a bit better about our own existence and like we’re not alone in the world. I’ve always had issues with making new friends partly because I’m a bit distrusting but mainly because most people don’t value friendship the way I do…it’s become a disposable commodity of convenience for most.
When I first meet someone, I know immediately if he/she will get added to the list as a “friend”. Maybe I’m just a good judge of character or have a knack for seeing the true essence of people but I doubt it…most probable answer is the unexplainable forces of attraction in the universe that allow “like to find like”. No matter the reason; it’s an almost insurmountable task to be chosen but the select few make the grade (even though I doubt any of them really know how rare it is to be added to my list of friends).
Most of my friends have been gained through contract at the office since I used to spend a great deal of time working from the lowest floors of the highest towers of the XYZ Corporation. The work wasn’t the greatest but the people were and it made for moments of humor and levity during the often stressful times of my existence. My friends were the people who pulled me away from the less important work tasks and on to the things in life that really mattered such as an extended lunch with great conversation. The prospect of having lunch with the crew was often the sole reason for my appearance at the office on many occasions…OK, virtually every occasion!
The crew was always ready for a good time but like all good things, it couldn’t last…EP and The Dietz moved to Seattle, KB-H moved to the UK and The Commish was dealt an undeserved hand by lesser men. In the end, it was down to me and GP to uphold the lunch tradition but change was lurking in the shadows. GP made it official with an upcoming move to DC…and then there was one.
I’m incredibly happy for all my friends that life has given them new adventures (even though it means I now have to go and audition new people down on GWC 3 for lunch buddies….maybe Ali will have pity and let me hang with them?) and I’m still friends with each and every one of them. Time and distance doesn’t change friendship as inclusion on the list means inclusion for life…for better or worse.
To all my friends, I raise my glass and say “Cheers” until we all meet again.
Friendship…The ability to share a common interest(s) with others and the sense of connection make us all feel a bit better about our own existence and like we’re not alone in the world. I’ve always had issues with making new friends partly because I’m a bit distrusting but mainly because most people don’t value friendship the way I do…it’s become a disposable commodity of convenience for most.
When I first meet someone, I know immediately if he/she will get added to the list as a “friend”. Maybe I’m just a good judge of character or have a knack for seeing the true essence of people but I doubt it…most probable answer is the unexplainable forces of attraction in the universe that allow “like to find like”. No matter the reason; it’s an almost insurmountable task to be chosen but the select few make the grade (even though I doubt any of them really know how rare it is to be added to my list of friends).
Most of my friends have been gained through contract at the office since I used to spend a great deal of time working from the lowest floors of the highest towers of the XYZ Corporation. The work wasn’t the greatest but the people were and it made for moments of humor and levity during the often stressful times of my existence. My friends were the people who pulled me away from the less important work tasks and on to the things in life that really mattered such as an extended lunch with great conversation. The prospect of having lunch with the crew was often the sole reason for my appearance at the office on many occasions…OK, virtually every occasion!
The crew was always ready for a good time but like all good things, it couldn’t last…EP and The Dietz moved to Seattle, KB-H moved to the UK and The Commish was dealt an undeserved hand by lesser men. In the end, it was down to me and GP to uphold the lunch tradition but change was lurking in the shadows. GP made it official with an upcoming move to DC…and then there was one.
I’m incredibly happy for all my friends that life has given them new adventures (even though it means I now have to go and audition new people down on GWC 3 for lunch buddies….maybe Ali will have pity and let me hang with them?) and I’m still friends with each and every one of them. Time and distance doesn’t change friendship as inclusion on the list means inclusion for life…for better or worse.
To all my friends, I raise my glass and say “Cheers” until we all meet again.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
I’m NOT sorry…
I’d planned to write some tame entry about graphology (Click here if you want to read the article) but after witnessing an unforgivable transgression against all manhood my mind was made up…it’s time to talk about the “Sorry for everything” syndrome which seems to be striking spineless men everywhere.
You’ve seen it before when some chump is apologizing to his girlfriend/wife for every single thing he does/says/doesn’t do/etc. even though he’s done nothing wrong…much less anything worthy of an apology. Every time I just want to walk up to this chump and say “Do you at least get to visit your manhood?” There’s no excuse for this behavior and no real man would tolerate it for even a second…especially from his significant other!
I’m not saying you should never apologize as some things merit a true and sincere apology such as telling your significant other her dress does make her look fat, spending your anniversary gift money at the strip club, etc. We (men), however, do NOT need to be apologizing for saying we don’t want to go shopping or looking at other women….it’s not natural and quite frankly, a crime against the rest of us who are true men.
We (my generation) are a generation raised by women which filled our minds with all the irrational bullsh*t and sensitivity nonsense but it had other, unintended side effects such guilt over meaningless things, a need to always be validated by word and action…in other words, it was an attempt to make us women. In the golden age, men acted like men and we didn’t apologize for acting as such. The time has come for all men to recapture this sense of self and end the “Sorry for everything” syndrome once and for all.
In today’s example, I was out at a local shopping plaza running a few errands when I spot the couple. A normal, average couple but I could tell he was broken from a mile away (guys know this look…the look of a man who just sleep walks through the days because he thinks he can’t do better and this is all life has to offer). He committed the unspeakable crime of not getting a cart for her purchases so he was dressed down (in front of other self-respecting men) for this transgression. His response? “I’m sorry….I’ll go get a cart”. WTF…are those your fake testicles hanging from the trailer hitch?????
The people in earshot just looked on while the other whipped men just starred at the ground in silent appreciation it wasn’t them…this time. I stared him dead in the eyes with a look of disdain reserved only for the lowest of the low. How could he let her do this without a word of protest? Was it to avoid creating a scene? Maybe it was fear of being “cut off”?
If he’s afraid she’ll revoke his access to the golden triangle then I’ve got some really bad news for him…she’d sleep with someone else in a second if he exhibited the traits of a real man! She’s with him because he’s been broken (i.e. he’s not going anywhere so he’s “safe” and available when SHE wants him) but she’d cheat in a second with a man who took control and, quite frankly, acted like a man! The chump gets exactly what he deserves for not taking control of the situation and re-introducing her to the man he should (and probably used to) be.
Being a man means something different to everyone but to me it means taking care of the people you love, being able to fix/build anything, standing up for what matters (even if it means getting your ass kicked), doing the right thing even if it’s not popular and most importantly, being true to yourself at all times. I’ve always adhered to these principles and maybe I’m a dinosaur, but I believe men need to be strong and take charge. This whole belief that men need to be compliant to their women is nonsense and something for the metrosexual man…which offends me to the see the word “man” even close to the word metrosexual.
To apologize for living by the man code is absurd and I, for one, will never apologize for anything as meaningless as not getting a cart…I’ll save my apologies for something worthy of an apology. You might condemn this entry as sexist, chauvinist, etc. and to that I say “I’m a man and damn proud of it!”….and NO, I’m not sorry!
You’ve seen it before when some chump is apologizing to his girlfriend/wife for every single thing he does/says/doesn’t do/etc. even though he’s done nothing wrong…much less anything worthy of an apology. Every time I just want to walk up to this chump and say “Do you at least get to visit your manhood?” There’s no excuse for this behavior and no real man would tolerate it for even a second…especially from his significant other!
I’m not saying you should never apologize as some things merit a true and sincere apology such as telling your significant other her dress does make her look fat, spending your anniversary gift money at the strip club, etc. We (men), however, do NOT need to be apologizing for saying we don’t want to go shopping or looking at other women….it’s not natural and quite frankly, a crime against the rest of us who are true men.
We (my generation) are a generation raised by women which filled our minds with all the irrational bullsh*t and sensitivity nonsense but it had other, unintended side effects such guilt over meaningless things, a need to always be validated by word and action…in other words, it was an attempt to make us women. In the golden age, men acted like men and we didn’t apologize for acting as such. The time has come for all men to recapture this sense of self and end the “Sorry for everything” syndrome once and for all.
In today’s example, I was out at a local shopping plaza running a few errands when I spot the couple. A normal, average couple but I could tell he was broken from a mile away (guys know this look…the look of a man who just sleep walks through the days because he thinks he can’t do better and this is all life has to offer). He committed the unspeakable crime of not getting a cart for her purchases so he was dressed down (in front of other self-respecting men) for this transgression. His response? “I’m sorry….I’ll go get a cart”. WTF…are those your fake testicles hanging from the trailer hitch?????
The people in earshot just looked on while the other whipped men just starred at the ground in silent appreciation it wasn’t them…this time. I stared him dead in the eyes with a look of disdain reserved only for the lowest of the low. How could he let her do this without a word of protest? Was it to avoid creating a scene? Maybe it was fear of being “cut off”?
If he’s afraid she’ll revoke his access to the golden triangle then I’ve got some really bad news for him…she’d sleep with someone else in a second if he exhibited the traits of a real man! She’s with him because he’s been broken (i.e. he’s not going anywhere so he’s “safe” and available when SHE wants him) but she’d cheat in a second with a man who took control and, quite frankly, acted like a man! The chump gets exactly what he deserves for not taking control of the situation and re-introducing her to the man he should (and probably used to) be.
Being a man means something different to everyone but to me it means taking care of the people you love, being able to fix/build anything, standing up for what matters (even if it means getting your ass kicked), doing the right thing even if it’s not popular and most importantly, being true to yourself at all times. I’ve always adhered to these principles and maybe I’m a dinosaur, but I believe men need to be strong and take charge. This whole belief that men need to be compliant to their women is nonsense and something for the metrosexual man…which offends me to the see the word “man” even close to the word metrosexual.
To apologize for living by the man code is absurd and I, for one, will never apologize for anything as meaningless as not getting a cart…I’ll save my apologies for something worthy of an apology. You might condemn this entry as sexist, chauvinist, etc. and to that I say “I’m a man and damn proud of it!”….and NO, I’m not sorry!
Sunday, April 26, 2009
You can’t hurry love…no, you’ve just got to wait and wait and wait
There’s an old adage that love finds you when you least expect it. Maybe that’s true but I’m getting pretty damn tired of waiting around for it to catch up with me! Part of it’s my fault but some of it’s beyond my control…or is it?
I’m a risk taker in all aspects of life so not afraid to take a chance to find the right person. Only a man determined to find love would chart his course based on the prison pen pal program (which would have worked except they kept raising the cost of stamps!) and then Russian mail order brides to ultimately end up at The Fish. These are not the actions of a shrinking violet but a man taking charge of his destiny!
The sound of ticking clocks made Neenah Pickett decide to set a deadline to find a husband…52 weeks. There just seems to be something wrong with the idea of placing a time limit on finding “the one”. Finding love is hard enough so does anyone really need the added pressure of a self-imposed deadline? I say no but understand her sense of urgency…I also hear the ticking of the clock as I careen headlong towards 40 (T-minus 106 days and counting) and the magic moment when my odds of ever marrying are reduced to less than 10%.
I’d also be afraid to pick the wrong person simply to meet the deadline because I hate to fail at anything (which is humorous because I’ve failed at almost everything at least once…usually twice). If I did pick the wrong person then maybe the next experiment could be called “Losing love in 52 weeks” or maybe “Losing half of all my stuff in 52 weeks”. Even if I failed, it would mean I succeeded if only for a short time…much better than my recent dating adventures .
I’m not down on dating as I’m in a very good place and happy with my life as it exists now. Would I like more? Sure…who wouldn’t but I’m not going to turn into a pumpkin if the clock strikes 12 at the end of the 52nd week and I’m still checking the single box.
I’m a risk taker in all aspects of life so not afraid to take a chance to find the right person. Only a man determined to find love would chart his course based on the prison pen pal program (which would have worked except they kept raising the cost of stamps!) and then Russian mail order brides to ultimately end up at The Fish. These are not the actions of a shrinking violet but a man taking charge of his destiny!
The sound of ticking clocks made Neenah Pickett decide to set a deadline to find a husband…52 weeks. There just seems to be something wrong with the idea of placing a time limit on finding “the one”. Finding love is hard enough so does anyone really need the added pressure of a self-imposed deadline? I say no but understand her sense of urgency…I also hear the ticking of the clock as I careen headlong towards 40 (T-minus 106 days and counting) and the magic moment when my odds of ever marrying are reduced to less than 10%.
I’d also be afraid to pick the wrong person simply to meet the deadline because I hate to fail at anything (which is humorous because I’ve failed at almost everything at least once…usually twice). If I did pick the wrong person then maybe the next experiment could be called “Losing love in 52 weeks” or maybe “Losing half of all my stuff in 52 weeks”. Even if I failed, it would mean I succeeded if only for a short time…much better than my recent dating adventures .
I’m not down on dating as I’m in a very good place and happy with my life as it exists now. Would I like more? Sure…who wouldn’t but I’m not going to turn into a pumpkin if the clock strikes 12 at the end of the 52nd week and I’m still checking the single box.
Friday, April 10, 2009
At least my resume isn’t fake…
It seems the whole world is obsessed with how they look regardless of whether you live in a big city or the middle of nowhere. I’ve come to expect a certain level of shallowness and vanity in people (especially in the girls I date) but something is definitely wrong when career “experts” start trying to sell job seekers on the idea that looks beat experience in a competitive market.
I had to laugh when one of the surgeons in the article mentions “employers naturally tend to go to a person who looks fresher and younger, despite who is better qualified” and how cosmetic surgery “has become a necessity for some”. That’s probably true if you sell copiers, long-distance or your gig involves a stripper pole but the majority of jobs require a bit more skill and experience.
Let’s put the surgeon’s theory to the test:
You’ve been told you need life-saving surgery and must choose between two surgeons….one is ultra-hot but has no experience and the other is plain but very experienced. Who are you going to choose?
I’d choose “experience” for the surgery but would get the hot girl’s digits for later. OK...I'd probably try to get both their numbers.
I’m constantly dismayed by the lack of ethics from plastic surgeons as they try to sell how changing your physical appearance will make you a better person, give you more confidence, self-esteem, etc. Given they profit from the transaction, their motives are crystal clear (although I find it funny that 15 years ago they used to disclaim that surgery would NOT increase your self-esteem or make you feel better about yourself…welcome to the power of the dollar!).
The fact doctors now endorse cosmetic procedures is disturbing to me because it lends some credibility to the whole affair. It’s not like receiving those anonymous spam emails for penis enlargement which don’t work...well, we know they don't work now. I used to hate opening my inbox as it was always full of those emails...finally had to tell my girlfriend to stop forwarding them to me!
The article also mentions spending money for surgery can help increase your salary so let’s look at a real-life example. A friend was working for Company A making $75K (before bonus) a year. She opted to get breast enlargement for $4K and subsequently took a position at another company for $32K (no bonus). I’m no math genius but looks like a 50% pay cut after spending $4K for the surgery! The only person who could sell that kind of math as a “gain” is my broker and I plan to discuss his math skills if he'll ever return my calls.
I’ll never have cosmetic surgery just to get a job for two reasons. First, I really don't care that much about my career to actually suffer for it...I'm a professional nerd not an artist! Second, I'm hands down the best looking of my peer group which is both interesting and terribly frightening (remember, I'm a professional nerd).
I'm quite happy with the way I look and see no reason to mess up a good thing. Besides, long before I became the skilled professional of current day, I had a lucrative gig as a “before” model and that's one profession that will always be looking for average, normal guys like me!
I had to laugh when one of the surgeons in the article mentions “employers naturally tend to go to a person who looks fresher and younger, despite who is better qualified” and how cosmetic surgery “has become a necessity for some”. That’s probably true if you sell copiers, long-distance or your gig involves a stripper pole but the majority of jobs require a bit more skill and experience.
Let’s put the surgeon’s theory to the test:
You’ve been told you need life-saving surgery and must choose between two surgeons….one is ultra-hot but has no experience and the other is plain but very experienced. Who are you going to choose?
I’d choose “experience” for the surgery but would get the hot girl’s digits for later. OK...I'd probably try to get both their numbers.
I’m constantly dismayed by the lack of ethics from plastic surgeons as they try to sell how changing your physical appearance will make you a better person, give you more confidence, self-esteem, etc. Given they profit from the transaction, their motives are crystal clear (although I find it funny that 15 years ago they used to disclaim that surgery would NOT increase your self-esteem or make you feel better about yourself…welcome to the power of the dollar!).
The fact doctors now endorse cosmetic procedures is disturbing to me because it lends some credibility to the whole affair. It’s not like receiving those anonymous spam emails for penis enlargement which don’t work...well, we know they don't work now. I used to hate opening my inbox as it was always full of those emails...finally had to tell my girlfriend to stop forwarding them to me!
The article also mentions spending money for surgery can help increase your salary so let’s look at a real-life example. A friend was working for Company A making $75K (before bonus) a year. She opted to get breast enlargement for $4K and subsequently took a position at another company for $32K (no bonus). I’m no math genius but looks like a 50% pay cut after spending $4K for the surgery! The only person who could sell that kind of math as a “gain” is my broker and I plan to discuss his math skills if he'll ever return my calls.
I’ll never have cosmetic surgery just to get a job for two reasons. First, I really don't care that much about my career to actually suffer for it...I'm a professional nerd not an artist! Second, I'm hands down the best looking of my peer group which is both interesting and terribly frightening (remember, I'm a professional nerd).
I'm quite happy with the way I look and see no reason to mess up a good thing. Besides, long before I became the skilled professional of current day, I had a lucrative gig as a “before” model and that's one profession that will always be looking for average, normal guys like me!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Pro-V Superstar...
Ever have one of those days where you feel like you’re walking through a TV commercial? It’s like when I was walking down Madison Avenue and ran into the Burger King…big plastic head and all! I had one of those moments the other night when I met the Pro-V Superstar…we’ll call him Sampson.
It was a cloudy Thursday evening when Sampson walked in with a small group of people. He was part of the group but separate at the same time…somehow different, better than the rest. It was his shoulder length, shiny, black hair. Dress codes be damned…he wasn’t afraid to show the Man his contempt for the well-groomed in the workplace.
I didn’t pay much attention to him at first but that soon changed as the group started scoping out seats right across from me. Normally, I don’t care but tonight was different as I couldn’t afford to be distracted…No, tonight I needed space and I definitely didn’t need to see Sampson sitting right across from me with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair.
My date for the evening (We’ll call her Delilah) sensed the impending doom of having this band of miscreant, bed-wetting, momma’s boys sitting near us and quickly moved a bag to make space for them at the other end of the bar. Crisis averted but here’s where things get interesting!
Out of the blue, Sampson proceeds to flip his hair like a supermodel (a FEMALE supermodel)! I could only think of the old Pantene commercials from the 90’s where she throws her hair back while running her hands down the length. He mirrored her motion but couldn’t stop at once, not twice, not even three times but an amazing five times! If this act of self-love had gone on any longer it would have required a parental advisory sticker.
On the fifth flip, he was ready to take on the world with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair securely behind his ears…just like when he walked in! He was on the prowl but, unfortunately for him, the place was virtually empty. Maybe his goal was to impress Delilah? Somehow, I don’t think it worked.
Let’s fast forward to the end of the evening as I met Sampson (alone) outside smoking a cigarette in the rain. I passed by on my way back into the night but not without saying, “Love the hair…I absolutely love the hair”. Was this beginning of a man crush much like EP’s “mush” for the Barilla guy? Probably not but given how hard he’d tried to impress everyone with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair he deserved a moment of recognition (validation?).
I couldn’t help but think about how he’d have been famous in the 90’s had he known kung-fu or maybe lived in Seattle and started a band. No man needs real talent when he has shoulder length, shiny, black hair. Maybe he would have gotten his own Pantene commercial? Maybe he could have gone over to L’Oreal? Sounds reasonable because we all know he’s worth it!
It was a cloudy Thursday evening when Sampson walked in with a small group of people. He was part of the group but separate at the same time…somehow different, better than the rest. It was his shoulder length, shiny, black hair. Dress codes be damned…he wasn’t afraid to show the Man his contempt for the well-groomed in the workplace.
I didn’t pay much attention to him at first but that soon changed as the group started scoping out seats right across from me. Normally, I don’t care but tonight was different as I couldn’t afford to be distracted…No, tonight I needed space and I definitely didn’t need to see Sampson sitting right across from me with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair.
My date for the evening (We’ll call her Delilah) sensed the impending doom of having this band of miscreant, bed-wetting, momma’s boys sitting near us and quickly moved a bag to make space for them at the other end of the bar. Crisis averted but here’s where things get interesting!
Out of the blue, Sampson proceeds to flip his hair like a supermodel (a FEMALE supermodel)! I could only think of the old Pantene commercials from the 90’s where she throws her hair back while running her hands down the length. He mirrored her motion but couldn’t stop at once, not twice, not even three times but an amazing five times! If this act of self-love had gone on any longer it would have required a parental advisory sticker.
On the fifth flip, he was ready to take on the world with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair securely behind his ears…just like when he walked in! He was on the prowl but, unfortunately for him, the place was virtually empty. Maybe his goal was to impress Delilah? Somehow, I don’t think it worked.
Let’s fast forward to the end of the evening as I met Sampson (alone) outside smoking a cigarette in the rain. I passed by on my way back into the night but not without saying, “Love the hair…I absolutely love the hair”. Was this beginning of a man crush much like EP’s “mush” for the Barilla guy? Probably not but given how hard he’d tried to impress everyone with his shoulder length, shiny, black hair he deserved a moment of recognition (validation?).
I couldn’t help but think about how he’d have been famous in the 90’s had he known kung-fu or maybe lived in Seattle and started a band. No man needs real talent when he has shoulder length, shiny, black hair. Maybe he would have gotten his own Pantene commercial? Maybe he could have gone over to L’Oreal? Sounds reasonable because we all know he’s worth it!
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Cool as Ice...
Just when you think it’s gone for good, you start to see them everywhere. Hiding out in the shadows or right out front in a crowd of people…it’s there. I’m talking about the unfortunate hair style choice known as the mullet. It’s back and scarier than ever.
I’ve been horrified (and humored) by the mullet for years. How something so absurd could be so loved by people even when it invites ridicule is beyond comprehension. Maybe it’s the “business up front…party out back” attitude or maybe it’s a signal (like a secret handshake) most normal people aren’t aware of yet. No matter the answer, I was almost convinced it had reached the point of extinction…until Friday night.
GP and I went down to NoDa for the gallery crawl to check out some art and maybe a band or two. The night was going well until we decided to stop at this bar to see the band setting up. The band was noting special (I seriously expected the keyboardist/singer to break into Styx’s Renegade at any moment…and it would have been an improvement!) but then HE hit the stage. Sporting a vintage AC/DC shirt (along with 40 extra pounds) and a second hand bass, he brought the classic skullet out for our entertainment. His love of the skullet told me he's a true believer in following your own way…even if it means walking around in circles for hours on end.
As entertaining as the skullet was on Friday night, I figured it was a one off good for a laugh (and believe me….GP and I laughed!). To my horror, I opened the e-version of my local paper to be greeted with the newest mullet type…the Urban Mullet!
This young man (Donnie Wayne Champagne…say it S-L-O-W-L-Y) is on the cutting edge of hair style by bringing us a totally new, never before seen version of the mullet. One commenter on the board summed it up by saying “Michael Jordan up front with Bob Marley out back”. Another asked if it was a dreadlock wig sliding off his head. Of all the posts, everyone mentioned the hair while very few discussed the fact he had a loaded gun at school. Guess cool hair trumps a felony any day of the week.
To compliment his progressive hair style, he also added the extra touch of partially shaving off his eyebrows. The article mentioned it’s a “gang sign” but I think the origin is much less threatening.
Yes, I brought out the original, partially shaved eyebrow guy…Vanilla Ice! While he didn’t sport a mullet he probably should have since it couldn't be any worse than the cut above. He’s currently sporting tattooed letters on each finger that spell out “Wide Open”. My choice for him would have been “Real Dumb”. Of course, maybe I’m a bit jealous as he NEVER has to work again while I’ll being getting up bright and early tomorrow for…work. Maybe I should be the one getting the “Real Dumb” tattoo?
I’ve been horrified (and humored) by the mullet for years. How something so absurd could be so loved by people even when it invites ridicule is beyond comprehension. Maybe it’s the “business up front…party out back” attitude or maybe it’s a signal (like a secret handshake) most normal people aren’t aware of yet. No matter the answer, I was almost convinced it had reached the point of extinction…until Friday night.
GP and I went down to NoDa for the gallery crawl to check out some art and maybe a band or two. The night was going well until we decided to stop at this bar to see the band setting up. The band was noting special (I seriously expected the keyboardist/singer to break into Styx’s Renegade at any moment…and it would have been an improvement!) but then HE hit the stage. Sporting a vintage AC/DC shirt (along with 40 extra pounds) and a second hand bass, he brought the classic skullet out for our entertainment. His love of the skullet told me he's a true believer in following your own way…even if it means walking around in circles for hours on end.
As entertaining as the skullet was on Friday night, I figured it was a one off good for a laugh (and believe me….GP and I laughed!). To my horror, I opened the e-version of my local paper to be greeted with the newest mullet type…the Urban Mullet!
This young man (Donnie Wayne Champagne…say it S-L-O-W-L-Y) is on the cutting edge of hair style by bringing us a totally new, never before seen version of the mullet. One commenter on the board summed it up by saying “Michael Jordan up front with Bob Marley out back”. Another asked if it was a dreadlock wig sliding off his head. Of all the posts, everyone mentioned the hair while very few discussed the fact he had a loaded gun at school. Guess cool hair trumps a felony any day of the week.
To compliment his progressive hair style, he also added the extra touch of partially shaving off his eyebrows. The article mentioned it’s a “gang sign” but I think the origin is much less threatening.
Yes, I brought out the original, partially shaved eyebrow guy…Vanilla Ice! While he didn’t sport a mullet he probably should have since it couldn't be any worse than the cut above. He’s currently sporting tattooed letters on each finger that spell out “Wide Open”. My choice for him would have been “Real Dumb”. Of course, maybe I’m a bit jealous as he NEVER has to work again while I’ll being getting up bright and early tomorrow for…work. Maybe I should be the one getting the “Real Dumb” tattoo?
Monday, February 23, 2009
Everyone’s your friend…
Why does everyone think they’re your friend on Facebook…even if they don’t know you? I’ve wondered how long it would take and it finally happened…I was forced to “friend” a co-worker or risk the consequences at the office. I wouldn’t have minded this if it was say “Brown Dress” who sent the invite but no such luck…it’s a co-worker I don’t really know (or care to know).
I started using Facebook to connect with my existing friends. For the most part, it was a success as I learned more about people I already knew and was able to share a bit more of my life with them. That’s the value of Facebook and it gave me the opportunity to share my life in ways I couldn’t in the past. Now that’s over and I’m pissed!
My Facebook profile used to contain a link to the blog but it’s gone now because of a single person. The co-worker isn’t a bad person (I really don’t know her at all) but I can’t “be myself” any longer because now I have to worry about something getting back to other people in the office. What if I decide to post my current status as “Looking for action” or post a picture of myself with some of the girls I meet (Yes, I actually do meet girls...some I don't even have to pay). It would set a world record in terms of office gossip and would end my so-called career at XYZ Corporation. Who knows…I may get lucky and nothing would happen (reference the infamous incident involving Frat Boy and 'The Captain') but wouldn’t place any bets on that outcome.
I knew it was a matter of time because everyone in my office is on Facebook…even Sr. Management. I’m constantly amazed at how many subordinates invite their manager to be “friends”. Maybe they think it insulates them from ever having to hear bad news because they’re Facebook friends? No such luck as the lay-offs continue whether your FB friends or not! Or maybe it’s because these people are so freaking boring they don’t care if their manager has details of their personal life? My life is NOT boring and my executive would surely cringe if he read about my exploits/opinions/blog.
I’m not ranting…just disappointed that something working so well could be ruined by one person. Now my FB profile is relegated to just being a place to learn more about my friends while I post nothing about myself. Maybe I should wait a few weeks and then “unfriend” the new addition? Doubtful she will ever look at my profile after the initial viewing so she’d never know. The fact I have to think this much about the situation is just sad.
Maybe it’s time to sign off Facebook? Will I miss out on important info like Becker buying an Odyssey minivan this past weekend? Or cool pics of my co-worker who has a beer can in her hand for every single photo? Or the update from the woman who is so far out of my league that I’m surprised she even speaks to me? Probably...but think I'll be OK just the same.
I started using Facebook to connect with my existing friends. For the most part, it was a success as I learned more about people I already knew and was able to share a bit more of my life with them. That’s the value of Facebook and it gave me the opportunity to share my life in ways I couldn’t in the past. Now that’s over and I’m pissed!
My Facebook profile used to contain a link to the blog but it’s gone now because of a single person. The co-worker isn’t a bad person (I really don’t know her at all) but I can’t “be myself” any longer because now I have to worry about something getting back to other people in the office. What if I decide to post my current status as “Looking for action” or post a picture of myself with some of the girls I meet (Yes, I actually do meet girls...some I don't even have to pay). It would set a world record in terms of office gossip and would end my so-called career at XYZ Corporation. Who knows…I may get lucky and nothing would happen (reference the infamous incident involving Frat Boy and 'The Captain') but wouldn’t place any bets on that outcome.
I knew it was a matter of time because everyone in my office is on Facebook…even Sr. Management. I’m constantly amazed at how many subordinates invite their manager to be “friends”. Maybe they think it insulates them from ever having to hear bad news because they’re Facebook friends? No such luck as the lay-offs continue whether your FB friends or not! Or maybe it’s because these people are so freaking boring they don’t care if their manager has details of their personal life? My life is NOT boring and my executive would surely cringe if he read about my exploits/opinions/blog.
I’m not ranting…just disappointed that something working so well could be ruined by one person. Now my FB profile is relegated to just being a place to learn more about my friends while I post nothing about myself. Maybe I should wait a few weeks and then “unfriend” the new addition? Doubtful she will ever look at my profile after the initial viewing so she’d never know. The fact I have to think this much about the situation is just sad.
Maybe it’s time to sign off Facebook? Will I miss out on important info like Becker buying an Odyssey minivan this past weekend? Or cool pics of my co-worker who has a beer can in her hand for every single photo? Or the update from the woman who is so far out of my league that I’m surprised she even speaks to me? Probably...but think I'll be OK just the same.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Heroes aren’t hard to find…but who's looking?
Who hasn’t dreamed of being a superhero with some really cool power out saving the day from evildoers? It was a recurring dream of mine but then, unfortunately, I turned six. Imagine my surprise when I stumbled across an article discussing the gaining popularity of becoming a true-to-life superhero (they prefer to be called “Reals”) and the existence of the World Superhero Registry.
The registry gives the superhero a chance to trade stories and tactics with other supers (and it sounds like they could use some help!). Here are a couple of the questions posted (with my responses):
Q: “Should I wear a mask?”
A: YES…if you have any self-respect…wear two!
Q: “How do I identify a street gang?”
A: They’ll be the ones kicking your *ss when you jump out and disrupt their business. OK….half will be kicking your *ss and the rest will be laughing.
Q: “Can you get bulletproof vests on eBay?”
A: I’m sure you can but I’d advise against buying the slightly used model.
In my quest to learn more about the subject, I found an article in Rolling Stone called "The Legend of Master Legend" which should be a must read for anyone contemplating the life of a Real as it dishes the good, bad and the truly stupid aspects of being a modern day superhero. This stuff is classic and I couldn’t stop laughing when Master Legend would describe his exploits using phrases like “all-night tour of Fist City!" or “the receiving end of the No Mercy Punch!". I wonder if the No Mercy Punch is followed by a KAA-POW!?
The article inspired me to get off the sidelines and become a crime fighting, defender of truth and justice…but I needed a name! A couple came to mind but who’d be afraid of Dark Justice or Knight of Pain? It was time for some serious help so had to hit the one website that generates names with real street cred! Here are the best selections:
Master Pimp E. Loco
Tricktickler E. Rockefeller
Master Pimp ESC
Treacherous E. Silk
What evildoer wouldn’t cower in fear at the mention of Treacherous E. Silk? I’ll be on the street handing out b*tchslaps to crooks, criminals and phonies while playing it smooth with the ladies. Hey, superhero business is hard work so nothing wrong with getting down with a few ladies between thrashing the bad guys. Don’t forget…I start out treacherous but end up silk!
Now that I’ve got a name, I need a costume and not one of those silly wrestler masks so went right to The Source for the perfect outfit (FYI…make sure your volume is UP when you go to the site : ) Lot’s of selections but think Treacherous E. Silk should greet the world in this timeless classic that demands respect. Your costume should make a statement so choose carefully…or you might end up like this unfortunate picture of Rick James (see below). Of course, Rick was so d*mn cool he pulled it off!!! Much respect…
The registry gives the superhero a chance to trade stories and tactics with other supers (and it sounds like they could use some help!). Here are a couple of the questions posted (with my responses):
Q: “Should I wear a mask?”
A: YES…if you have any self-respect…wear two!
Q: “How do I identify a street gang?”
A: They’ll be the ones kicking your *ss when you jump out and disrupt their business. OK….half will be kicking your *ss and the rest will be laughing.
Q: “Can you get bulletproof vests on eBay?”
A: I’m sure you can but I’d advise against buying the slightly used model.
In my quest to learn more about the subject, I found an article in Rolling Stone called "The Legend of Master Legend" which should be a must read for anyone contemplating the life of a Real as it dishes the good, bad and the truly stupid aspects of being a modern day superhero. This stuff is classic and I couldn’t stop laughing when Master Legend would describe his exploits using phrases like “all-night tour of Fist City!" or “the receiving end of the No Mercy Punch!". I wonder if the No Mercy Punch is followed by a KAA-POW!?
The article inspired me to get off the sidelines and become a crime fighting, defender of truth and justice…but I needed a name! A couple came to mind but who’d be afraid of Dark Justice or Knight of Pain? It was time for some serious help so had to hit the one website that generates names with real street cred! Here are the best selections:
Master Pimp E. Loco
Tricktickler E. Rockefeller
Master Pimp ESC
Treacherous E. Silk
What evildoer wouldn’t cower in fear at the mention of Treacherous E. Silk? I’ll be on the street handing out b*tchslaps to crooks, criminals and phonies while playing it smooth with the ladies. Hey, superhero business is hard work so nothing wrong with getting down with a few ladies between thrashing the bad guys. Don’t forget…I start out treacherous but end up silk!
Now that I’ve got a name, I need a costume and not one of those silly wrestler masks so went right to The Source for the perfect outfit (FYI…make sure your volume is UP when you go to the site : ) Lot’s of selections but think Treacherous E. Silk should greet the world in this timeless classic that demands respect. Your costume should make a statement so choose carefully…or you might end up like this unfortunate picture of Rick James (see below). Of course, Rick was so d*mn cool he pulled it off!!! Much respect…
I’ve got the name and threads but something is still missing…protection. No, not that kind of protection…I’m talking Magic 8-Ball dispenser of justice. Magic 8 Ball says “Not likely” if you think you’re going to avoid the business end of this stick. Of course, street life is dangerous so grabbing The Dice too. Evildoers roll craps and Treacherous E. Silk will be there to bring his pimp hand strong.
Only in America can mostly normal people dress in costume and patrol the streets. Their intentions are good and who couldn’t use a little more hope in these trying times? Maybe Green Scorpion was on to something when he said, “Everyone has the opportunity to awaken and become who they always wanted to be. Some people just hit the snooze button and go back to sleep.” Indeed...
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Wanna see her dance?
Someone once told me, "The only people who have a problem with tattoos are people who don’t have one”. I’ve got no problem with them but I do have a problem with BAD tattoos! Be it bad choices in art (anything involving Nintendo, Star Wars or science fiction will ALWAYS be a bad choice) or poor execution in the actual inking (make sure the guy slinging ink isn’t as drunk as you), the consequences are a permanent reminder of a bad decision.
When I was but a small lad growing up in (town name withheld), I saw my first tattoo up close and personal and the experience changed my life. My friend Frank’s grandfather had been all over the world with the Navy…back when being in the Navy was more like being a pirate than a regular job. He was hardcore (he got his ear pierced the first time he crossed the equator and wore a gold hoop….this was YEARS before men wore earrings!) and looked like he’d kick your a** if you stared at him too long. On one of his voyages to somewhere in the South Pacific, he’d gotten a tattoo of a topless hula girl on his forearm but the ink had blurred over the years so you really had to look close to see anything outside of an outline. I was 12 years old and it was a topless girl so I looked….really close! One day he noticed my interest in the ink and we had the following conversation:
Him: “You like my hula girl?”
Esc: “Ahhh….I guess”
Him: “Wanna see her dance?”
Esc: “Uh….OK”
At that moment, he proceeded to shake his arm and the loose skin swayed back and forth so it appeared she was dancing. I was overcome by a wave of absolute revulsion and my psyche was scarred forever. To this day, I can still see her “dance”. It was at that point I decided to never get a tattoo…and I still don’t have any!
You may be thinking that bad tattoos only happen to aged sailors or people who can’t afford to get good ink. Not so…even celebrities get BAD tattoos! Some of these are just plain awful choices in body art and it makes me question what they were thinking when they sat in the chair and said, “Ink it…” If I had the cash of any of these people, my next action after seeing myself in this gallery would be to call a qualified professional skilled in tattoo removal. Of course, it’s expensive to have a tattoo removed and quite painful so two more reason yours truly is still on the sideline.
Of course, there is alternative in the works for those of us with commitment issues…it’s an ink that dissolves! How cool is this concept…you get your art without the commitment. Now you can get the name of your special someone (OK…special right now) inked onto your body with no concern for permanence. In the past, tattooing someone’s name was the surest and quickest way to see a relationship end! You were stuck with their name on your body so you had to explain it to the next girl (and no women wants to look up at you during the “O” moment and see your ex’s name) or only date women with the same name as your ex. The latter would seriously limit choices if you don’t take the necessary precautions.
Some years ago, I saw a guy who had the names of three women tattooed on his arm and it seemed to work for him. The names were Tiffany, Crystal and Amber…all popular stripper stage names! He looked like the kind of guy who’d frequent a very low class of strip joints so he probably had no issues convincing the current Tiffany he’d tattooed her name on his arm just to meet her. It’s a move of pure genius…if you like to date strippers.
On top of my commitment issues (tattoos only : ), I’m also not down with the whole needle thing…I’ve seen my fair share of needles so not voluntarily offering up any part of my body for a tattoo. For those of us with all these issues who still want a tattoo, I give you the no commit tattoo! Now you can have it all and still wear short sleeves to the company picnic. So, next time you see Esc and I’ve got the coolest Japanese Koi sleeve you’ve ever seen, don’t think I’ve moved to new level of cool…know that I’m still the same old Esc you’ve always made fun of at every opportunity. John Mayer scored Jennifer Aniston with his cool Koi sleeve but is that really an accomplishment? She slept with the dude from the Chili Peppers so not thinking a cool tat (or quality dentistry) is really high on her list of criteria.
I’ve got no issue with other people getting good tattoos (Greg’s work is first class…but I was a bit disturbed by the amount of butt cheek work on guys) but it’s just not for me. I’m so random…could never settle on anything. I do appreciate the art form and kudos to my friends who have ink (Scott, Johnnie G and GP)…no commitment issues with these guys!
I also think tattoos on girls can be cool if done tastefully and discrete. I’ve never dated a woman with ink but would be open to the experience…as long as it not on her forehead (especially if the word “Crazy” is tattooed there)! Of course, if “Crazy” was tattooed on her forehead then I’d know a lot sooner than usual! : )
When I was but a small lad growing up in (town name withheld), I saw my first tattoo up close and personal and the experience changed my life. My friend Frank’s grandfather had been all over the world with the Navy…back when being in the Navy was more like being a pirate than a regular job. He was hardcore (he got his ear pierced the first time he crossed the equator and wore a gold hoop….this was YEARS before men wore earrings!) and looked like he’d kick your a** if you stared at him too long. On one of his voyages to somewhere in the South Pacific, he’d gotten a tattoo of a topless hula girl on his forearm but the ink had blurred over the years so you really had to look close to see anything outside of an outline. I was 12 years old and it was a topless girl so I looked….really close! One day he noticed my interest in the ink and we had the following conversation:
Him: “You like my hula girl?”
Esc: “Ahhh….I guess”
Him: “Wanna see her dance?”
Esc: “Uh….OK”
At that moment, he proceeded to shake his arm and the loose skin swayed back and forth so it appeared she was dancing. I was overcome by a wave of absolute revulsion and my psyche was scarred forever. To this day, I can still see her “dance”. It was at that point I decided to never get a tattoo…and I still don’t have any!
You may be thinking that bad tattoos only happen to aged sailors or people who can’t afford to get good ink. Not so…even celebrities get BAD tattoos! Some of these are just plain awful choices in body art and it makes me question what they were thinking when they sat in the chair and said, “Ink it…” If I had the cash of any of these people, my next action after seeing myself in this gallery would be to call a qualified professional skilled in tattoo removal. Of course, it’s expensive to have a tattoo removed and quite painful so two more reason yours truly is still on the sideline.
Of course, there is alternative in the works for those of us with commitment issues…it’s an ink that dissolves! How cool is this concept…you get your art without the commitment. Now you can get the name of your special someone (OK…special right now) inked onto your body with no concern for permanence. In the past, tattooing someone’s name was the surest and quickest way to see a relationship end! You were stuck with their name on your body so you had to explain it to the next girl (and no women wants to look up at you during the “O” moment and see your ex’s name) or only date women with the same name as your ex. The latter would seriously limit choices if you don’t take the necessary precautions.
Some years ago, I saw a guy who had the names of three women tattooed on his arm and it seemed to work for him. The names were Tiffany, Crystal and Amber…all popular stripper stage names! He looked like the kind of guy who’d frequent a very low class of strip joints so he probably had no issues convincing the current Tiffany he’d tattooed her name on his arm just to meet her. It’s a move of pure genius…if you like to date strippers.
On top of my commitment issues (tattoos only : ), I’m also not down with the whole needle thing…I’ve seen my fair share of needles so not voluntarily offering up any part of my body for a tattoo. For those of us with all these issues who still want a tattoo, I give you the no commit tattoo! Now you can have it all and still wear short sleeves to the company picnic. So, next time you see Esc and I’ve got the coolest Japanese Koi sleeve you’ve ever seen, don’t think I’ve moved to new level of cool…know that I’m still the same old Esc you’ve always made fun of at every opportunity. John Mayer scored Jennifer Aniston with his cool Koi sleeve but is that really an accomplishment? She slept with the dude from the Chili Peppers so not thinking a cool tat (or quality dentistry) is really high on her list of criteria.
I’ve got no issue with other people getting good tattoos (Greg’s work is first class…but I was a bit disturbed by the amount of butt cheek work on guys) but it’s just not for me. I’m so random…could never settle on anything. I do appreciate the art form and kudos to my friends who have ink (Scott, Johnnie G and GP)…no commitment issues with these guys!
I also think tattoos on girls can be cool if done tastefully and discrete. I’ve never dated a woman with ink but would be open to the experience…as long as it not on her forehead (especially if the word “Crazy” is tattooed there)! Of course, if “Crazy” was tattooed on her forehead then I’d know a lot sooner than usual! : )
Monday, December 22, 2008
Letting Go...
(To start at the beginning of the series, check out "Fake It..." )
While I’m still firmly planted in Phase Two, the next chapter is already starting to take shape…The third phase appears to be called “Letting go”.
In order to let things go, you’ve got to take inventory of your life to determine what should stay and what should go…I had a truly stupid amount of unnecessary “baggage” so housekeeping would be working mandatory overtime. It was embarrassing to think I’d wasted time and energy carrying this junk as some of it happened so long ago I couldn’t remember all the details…but I was still holding on to it! It reminded me of a story…
“Two monks were walking along a river and they came up a woman who needed to cross but couldn’t because of the rushing water. One of the monks agreed to carry the woman across the river on his back. Upon reaching the other side, the woman thanked the monk and went on her way.
The two monks continued down the path in silence until the first monk commented, “Why did you carry that woman when you knew it violated your sacred vows?”
The second monk replied, “Because it was the right thing to do”
“It was wrong and you shouldn’t have” stated the first monk.
For the next few miles, the first monk kept talking about the woman.
The second monk stopped and said, “I left her at the banks of the river…why do you continue to carry her?”
(Wow! Can I botch a storyline or what? !?!? You get the point...)
Lessons I’ve learned:
If you can’t change something and it causes you pain, why carry it forward? Let it go…
If you see others struggling with challenges, you are obligated to help them…it’s the right thing to do
Letting go means forgiving others who have wronged you but, more importantly, it means forgiving yourself
Normally, I don’t write about life projects in progress (or anything this close to New Age psychobabble) but I needed to get it out of my system.
The "black cloud" followed me for too many years and I see it over several of my friends who are experiencing difficult life challenges. I’m no role model (my next series of entries will dispel any myths of that ever being true) but this experiment has been positive and I’d be selfish not to share if it can help others. Maybe the name of Phase Four is “Pay it Forward…”? I’ll let you know when I get there….
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